A Lady in Turmoil
by karala.green
Summary: One-shot. AU. A Sequel to Blind. With many choices available, Rinoa chose one that would affect Squall.


_**Author's Note: **_This is the sequel to _**Blind**_.

I don't like having two separate accounts so I'm transferring everything here. It's not much but still… I wrote them, I can't leave them to rot like that (*grins).

This is not a carbon copy of the first version I posted in the inactive account (thing in the sky). The same plot though but thoughts are organized and I hope I improved grammar, spelling and such.

Warning, this is kind of emo.

Enjoy! :)

_**First Posted: **__**08.06.06 **_from my inactive account _**thing(dot)in(dot)the(dot)sky**_

_**Disclaimer**_: I don't own any of the characters.

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**A Lady in Turmoil**

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Rinoa sat in one corner of their wide bedroom while she hugged her knees to her chest. She didn't keep track on how long she stayed like that, staring at the floor blankly. It was probably her sore back or the squirming in her stomach but eventually, she stood up and slowly made her way downstairs.

Squall was supposed to be home hours ago.

_Where is he?_ Her mind was filled with thoughts of where he might be and it wasn't all soothing.

She looked out the window. The sky was turning orange as the sun was setting slowly.

_He's with another girl._

_No, he's not._

_It happened one time._

_That was my imagination._

_It was real and _you_ know it._

She closed her eyes for a while. She breathed deeply as images filled her head.

_Squall loves me._

_He loves the other one too._

_The other one doesn't exist._

As much as she hated to admit that she had a sensible side that constantly opposed her blind side, she was being stubborn for refusing to entertain the thoughts and treated it as an annoying friend meddling with her life. She walked away from the window as the orange sky started to change to a darker shade. She made her way towards the kitchen. She opened the freezer and took out what she could call a perfect dinner – roast and veggies.

She sliced the vegetables and prepared everything carefully… and slowly. She placed it in the oven and prepared the table. It looked kind of special tonight.

Hours later, everything was set. She sat and waited. The clock in the kitchen ticked teasingly. Rinoa stared at it blankly: **9:30 PM**.

"Squall," she whispered to the air.

As if on cue, there was a knock on the door and she stood up to open it. In her excitement, before the next set of knocks could begin, the door was already open. She smiled when she saw Squall standing in front of her with his fist suspended in the air. He lowered his hand and looked at her. He was not the sweet Squall she expected to see but a Squall who seemed to be in a bad mood.

"Are you alright?" were the words that came out from Rinoa's mouth.

"Just tired," Squall replied and walked into the living room without even greeting Rinoa _properly_.

"I prepared dinner. Let's eat," Rinoa invited and watched as he sat on the couch and turned the TV on.

"I don't feel like eating tonight. Go ahead and eat without me," Squall replied.

Rinoa turned around and walked towards the kitchen whispering to herself: "But I waited for you."

She ate slowly. She lost her appetite but forced herself to eat to keep her mind away from thinking of Squall's cold manner. After, she fixed things up and made her way towards the room she shared with him.

He was already in bed when she entered the room. She undressed and wore something more appropriate for a night of sleep – or if she was lucky, a night of no sleep. She turned off the lights and laid down beside him.

She thought about it for a while and smiled thinking of the possible events that could take place tonight. With thoughts of love, she turned to face him and remembered the bad aura surrounding him tonight. She felt sorry that he had a bad day and she couldn't bring herself to wake him up for her selfish desires. She watched him sleeping peacefully. His face looked so serene, without the subtle lines of worry that she noticed when she opened the door for him.

Rinoa touched Squall's cheek and smiled as she kissed him lightly on the lips and nestled closer to him.

"Quistis," Squall whispered. Rinoa's eyes turned to him.

"What?" She asked.

"…sorry," Squall whispered. His eyes were closed.

_He's talking in his sleep._ Rinoa watched him. Her hand fell back down on the bed as he shifted his head on the other side of the pillow.

"Leave Rinoa… but… soon," Squall whispered.

Rinoa could only make out parts of the sentence but it made sense to her. Tears rolled down her cheeks, her blind side finally unblinded.

"Quistis… wait…" Squall tossed and turned and faced Rinoa again. Rinoa stared at him lovingly.

She was causing him pain – the pain of choosing.

He found it hard to be with the one he truly loves. He didn't want to hurt Rinoa. She cried silently, biting back the sobs that shook her body.

_This is not your imagination._

_He loves Quistis. Not me._

_He loves you too…_

_I'm not so sure about that anymore._

A snap in her head made her slowly get up from the bed.

_I'll make it easier for him._

Tears continued to roll down her cheeks. She let it flow freely. There was no point in caring about tears anymore. It was worth it. It was for someone she loved.

She walked towards the kitchen without bothering to turn the light on. She opened one of the drawers and took out a knife. The same knife she used to cut the veggies with a while ago. She stared at it for a while. It glinted in the dark.

She walked back up the stairs. She went into the bathroom and took a towel. She set everything and placed something on the bedside table.

"I love you, Squall…"

She took her position beside the bed and watched Squall sleeping with a slight line of worry on his forehead as if knowing what was going to happen next. Rinoa was holding the towel with the other hand and the knife with the other. The tears stopped.

_Rinoa had a lot of choices and she chose one._

_One that would change everything… forever._

She bent down and kissed Squall. He was still in deep sleep. She raised the knife. It glinted ominously in the dark.

"I love you…"

She was driven to the edge. She was about to do something extremely crazy.

The sickening sound of knife meeting flesh filled the air momentarily.

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Sun rays penetrated the lace curtains and the light flooded the room.

_Red…_

_Blood red_…

Squall knew there was something different about the room the moment he opened his eyes.

A lifeless body sprawled on the floor with a blood red towel that she placed over the deep wound she made.

Moments later, a scream was heard.

Not a scream of fear… but of loss.

All that was left were memories… and a letter…

The letter she placed on the bedside table.

_I love you, _the letter began with a shaky script that Squall suspected to have been written with an unsteady hand.

… _and hurting you is the last thing that I would ever do._

_I know it's her you love. I want you to be with her._

_You couldn't leave me for her… were you afraid of hurting me?_

_Long ago, when I saw you kiss her, I already died of pain inside._

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**END **

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_**Author's Note**_: (*sigh) So, that's how it is.

Don't get me wrong, I love Rinoa and Squall… it's just that when I decided to write a fanfic involving them, this was what popped up.

I hope you review and thanks in advance! :)

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_**Reviews for the old version of A Lady in Turmoil:**_

**LimeGrass **2008-09-22

That was extremely sad, I truly felt Rinoa's pain. Although I had hoped she chose to end things differently, my heart goes out to her. Maybe I'm just emotional right now but I really did cry reading this.

You are a talented writer. m(^_^)m

-LG

**Peaceful Dragon Rose** 2008-03-14

good story

**akane takamura** 2006-10-21

You made me cry... I'm not joking... I hope that you can make another sequel to this... It's just so sad... Sniff...='(

**Cerulean Crystal** 2006-09-22

oh...my god. this is so sad. i was crying reading it. how could squall do that? that's so mean. i can stop my tears. you're so mean. but i have to say it's really nice. can you write another one. it' s really good.

**cricketchick1990** 2006-09-22

aww no thats so sad, wonder what squalls reaction to the letter is, you should do a sequel to this one

**Nani mo Nai** 2006-09-06

ouch...i love this one better...are you gonna do a sequel for this too? poor Squall...i hate Quistis but i never really like Rinoa anyway. this is so sad,hahahaha...donno why i'm laughing though. keep writing hunny, you got talent.

Nani Mo Nai

**tw3akeddown** 2006-08-06

that's sad.

I really wish I didn't read this... because I enjoyed Blind so much...

Quistis.. she's my least favorite character in FF8... and it so happens that Squall is my favorite.

oh well... I actually liked the plot, I just didn't like the ending, because Rinoa killed herself. But, regardless, I think you could've made this into a great story.

**f u r o g u** 2006-08-06

aww O :  
poor rinoa  
it is a sequel??  
O :  
maybe i should check it, eh?  
that was good after all xDD


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